♪ 02 - Mass Effect 2: The Illusive Suite ♪ The News Desk lit up, displaying a black and white MBF sitting at the desk in an adorably fitted suit. The Synthetic dog began barking as a cute (but not grating) voice was overlaid over it. "Good stellar morning. I am Mono, here for Cloverpaw Interspace news. Today, our top story - Noir ravaged! Terrorist attack rocks the city, with an ever-climbing death toll. But first, financial news." Mono turned to face a different camera, Hekate's logo appearing in the corner. "This week, Hekate announced a new model of their Shenlong rifle series, causing their local profits and stock to skyrocket. They expect to have the new Denari driven weapon to be on store shelves by the end of Albion's year." The logo shifted to that of the Pangalactic Chophouse of Waffles. "PanCHOW has launched a new line of frozen breakfast meals for the full Aleph Cluster, allowing customers to take their breakfasts on the go. They expect the announcement to bring local profits to double in the remaining days of this year. When we come back, our top story." The feed faded out with a bowl materializing in front of Mono for him to lap from. The ad that followed was bright and colourful, using an Aoi Tanaka song and ending with the Smile Sundries slogan, “With a friendly smile, and a helpful heart, we always go the extra mile.” The screen faded back onto the news desk, overlaid with the Cloverpaw logo. Mono was back at the desk. "Welcome back. Our top story - Noir's rampant chaos! CIN sources have informed us that it was a localized terrorist action, targeting many structures across the city. Current tolls put the confirmed death count at over half a million, the missing persons at a comparable number, and the number of injured at 750,000 and climbing. We have a press conference delivered by the mayor of the city, Kandin Ta Jalokia, now." The feed cut to inside the Emperor's Castle lobby, where a podium was setup with many reporters and camera drones clustered in front of it. The mayor of the city, a dark-haired man with a hardened face, stood at the podium flanked by his white-haired, bespectacled assistant. "It is a sheer tragedy what has happened this week. But, Noir's stronger than that. And we've already found and put down the threat to our city's well-being - a new gang calling themselves the Talon Striders. Our chief of police and his heroic companions of the department were instrumental in these endeavors, and we thank them for their service. In the meantime, I will do my best to make sure everybody is doing their part to help this city recover from this heinous crime." Kandin said, punctuating the last two words with an excess of venom. The camera feed went back to Mono, now facing a different camera than previously. "And now, sports news. This week in frame racing, Jula pulled a surprising upset in both the Full Run and in the Ace league, with Seit SaAcala leading the Rolaan-only team to first place victories in both categories. Seit had this to say." The feed cut to an overjoyed Rolaan of a sandy scales hopping for joy in front of the camera, surrounded by his teammates. Other than a shrill "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" nothing was said and it cut back to Mono, who had folded over his ears. "Additionally, Selzen has initiated another feud with Fuyu, for the second time this year. Since the resolution of the previous one last month, fans have been itching for a rematch between the two." "And now, celebrity news. Lass Bunnington has pledged to donate a fortune to relief efforts in noir. She has also dedicated her profits from the remainder of the year towards rebuilding some of the lost infrastructure in Chelton from the explosions." Mono swiveled to face another camera. “This has been CIN. We hope you will tune in next time, and as always, shop Cloverpaw. Good day, arf arf!”
